I am Going to Buy a Groovy Condo Downtown

By Astra Burka

Architect and Filmaker

"Dreaming of Space"
Réunion, view of Indian Ocean
Photo by Astra Burka

Recently I decided to take a tour of the latest über kül condominiums by Freed Developments. Why? Because I am thinking of downsizing at some point and wanted to see what was available in the price range of $445,000 - $600,000 (approx. 900-1200 square feet). I was guided by a tall condo hostess to 75 Portland, interiors by Philippe Starck. The lobby was über white with a long diagonal table that continued in the outside space. Along with oversized white planting pots, these white objects dominated the interior court. The courtyard space, long, narrow, and 8 stories high, was claustrophobic.

I first thought the space I entered in the 1st unit was a large mudroom. I did not know that a “den” is defined as a windowless space. Or how would I have guessed in the 2nd unit that a 4 feet by 3 feet space with a column in it, was called a “den”. I went to look at a 3rd unit in the new Thomson residences and said: “Oh, what a huge walk-in closet with opaque glass sliding doors”. I was told this space was “the second bedroom”.  Can you imagine putting a child or guests in a windowless room? For the price, I was disappointed that Frigidaire stainless steel kitchen appliances were chosen instead of European products like Bosch and Miele. From the balcony, I could even reach into the open window of one of the Thomson Hotel rooms.




Who are these condos for? They are not designed for living. One of the spaces was so narrow that a conventional sofa and dining room table would not fit. Not to mention if you lived with a significant other or had friends over. Where would you put them? What ever happened to designing space for people?

Having received permission to visit the well publicized roof-top pool area, I definitely did not meet the test of looking like the über kül clients. I almost melted in the heat on the north facing side and had to move to a shadier spot. After paying $17.00 for a chardonnay served in a PLASTIC wine glass, with no nuts or anything, I realized why I do not buy into groovy condos: because I am not into “branding”.

I feel sorry for the 30 something crowd who do not realize that they are the victims of branding. The curtain wall and concrete slab construction does not seem to be an energy efficient solution. What happens to these condos five to ten years from now?

I am glad that I did not get conned into buying a unit. But they conned me on the roof-top pool. So I guess we are even.

My advice is, “never buy a condo without a history”.